Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Beauty is in the (infected) Eye of the Beholder

from the Bleacher Report website
Just how important are the cosmetic factors in the rhetorical formula of television vanity? I'm not sure, but the recent and unfortunate challenges faced by Olympic Broadcaster Bob Costas surely makes us ponder such issues. While Costas and NBC attributed the removal of the red-eyed Costas to his limited vision, one wonders if there were other considerations, like the "ewww" factor of the discomfort of viewers. Bob's eyes even have their own Twitter account(s).

This could surely be an opportunity to discuss the rhetorical composition of television news:

Interesting and provocative questions, to be sure. But... for a moment of levity, cue up your karaoke track of "Bette Davis Eyes" and sing along to the new hit - "Bob Costas Eyes."

His hair is Clairol brown
His lips the games reprise
He’ll never let you down
He’s got Bob Costas eyes
He'll talk about the half-pipe
and about Hockey on ice
He’s pure as Sochi snow
He got Bob Costas eyes

And he'll tease you
just to seize you
coz he know the triple-lutz will please you
He’s precocious and he knows just
How cold it gets in Belarus
He got the Biathalon in his sights
He’s got Bob Costas eyes

He talks about the luge
He breaks down the freestyle
His eyes are getting huge
He’s got Bob Costas eyes
And they’re a little red now
about grapefruit size
as he recaps cross-country
He got Bob Costas eyes

All the boys think it's a sty -
He's got Bob Costas eyes.

When I see him, I just start to cry - 
He's got Bob Costas eyes.